Open books we may be – talking constantly about our problems, our happinesses, our feels and what is causing them – but chances are it’s because we used to be the ones who didn’t talk it out.
We were once the ones who held it all inside and watched everything fell apart around us – and nobody knew why. We became numb to registering any emotion – not because we wanted to, but because we HAD to, to stay functioning day to day without our sadness taking over.
Nowadays, to feel anything at all, even the not so pleasant things, is a miracle we never want to go away. We took a long, hard road to learn the skill it takes to be open and honest about, and with, our selves – and we’ll be fucked if we ever back track down that road again.
Our honesty and ability to lay down exactly how we feel makes many squirm, some envious and most annoyed. But it is our gift and our curse – and is born from the ashes of a life where we were never spoken for.
It is not our responsibility to dull our shine so that others may sparkle around us. There is a cosmos of sky around us all, and enough room for all our stars to shine – our spaces do not need to shrink to allow others to grow.
I know I cry a lot, I laugh far too much and at inappropriate times, and my temper will shoot daggers at you through my eyeballs in a red hot second…but….my hugs are deep and warm, my “I love you”s mean what they say, my forgiveness is fast and real and my generosity is never token.
For all my heart sleeved brothers and sisters I say – Let those tears fall where they may, let your laugh be loud and FULL of snorts, let your temper show those around you what you stand for – let your love and care be outreaching, even if it isn’t returned every time.
You will have lived an honest life, and one where no one will ever be under any illusions how you feel – which can be the most painful source of heartbreak. Your connection to your soul and heart will be the water that nourishes the seeds in the souls of others around you, I promise.
Open books we may be, but our stories will be well worth the read by the end of the last page… shine on you sparkly bastards – shine on!